your skin smells lovely like sandalwood

standing at the edge of a construction site, we watched two red-winged blackbirds swoop and circle each other. i said they were like us. "they're in love" i added, lost in the moment. when i stop watching myself so carefully comments like that slip out around you. and even when i do watch myself closely you watch as well, and seem to know. i whisper what i'm feeling in those in-between hours that you know me in. you think i'm wonderful and i think you're suffering from temporary insanity. but this feels real and so right, and maybe that means that i can trust this. at least i've stopped pretending that i have any choice in the matter. my heart makes decisions before my head even understands what's going on. and i'm okay with that.